DOOMED!

You knew you were doomed when he breath his last. You knew too that the patience you failed to allow in your marriage naturally came to you. You sat down weeping  with your three young children suddenly turned orphans.

You knew you killed him with your temper that was hotter than volcano. You monitored his movements. Made war with him when he came home from work later than 6pm. You accused him on mere suspicions about every woman that comes in contact with him. You also accused him of the beautiful tea girl attached to his office. You were seething with rage when she came in almost every five minutes. She was beautiful, tall, shapely with generous bosom and a voice that was softer than fleeces. 

'Would you like to have tea sir?

'Would you like some cookies sir or should I make meat pies for you sir'.

You were too angry with her hospitality. You saw it as a ploy to take him from you. So you gave her a piece of your tongue.

'Stop that nonsense', you shouted. Did they tell you I don't know how to take care of my own eyes husband?' 

Startled, she stared at you in shock, her mouth half open.

You went on.

What is wrong with ladies of nowadays? You think every man you see is meant for your taking?

She wanted to explain that you misconstrued her actions but you would none of it.

Your husband tried to intervene but you lash at him

'Useless man! I know this is one out of many 

escapades you engage in.

He too was in shock and fits of rage but you were not bothered and so you went on with your invective.

'Whatever my husband is today was my hard work! No useless lady like yourself will come and reap where they have not sown'.

You rose up at once dwarfing the innocent lady with your voice steeped in volcanic rage who had stooped down crying in mournful sobs.

Other people came to reason with you but you hauled insults at them. You moved towards her, intending to beat her up. But your husband prevented you, standing between you and the sobbing lady.

That didnt stop you from calling her  a prostitute and all sorts of unprintable names.  She didn't even respond to any of your injurious words out of respect for your husband. 

Embarrassed and enraged, your husband  ordered you out of his office. But before you left, you promised to make him pay for taking you for granted with other women.

When he eventually came home, you gave him the part two of the show down. He didn't say a word but avoided you altogether. He wouldnt touch your food nor sleep in the same bed with you. But you were least concerned. Afterall, he did not send you packing. Even if he did, you knew you wouldn't bulge.

You watched him withdraw into self, managing  little smile he could with the children. You had become a stranger to him. That didn't bother you one bit. As far as you were concerned, no husband of yours will make you end up like your mother.

You were the only surviving child of your mother. You watched as your siblings die one after the other with small preventable sicknesses brought about by malnutrition. But your father was there. A mere shadow. Philandering his earnings with several women that he even brought to the house while your mother was battling to stay alive.

You remembered her last words to you:

'Never let any man take you for granted'. You nodded without understanding then. You watched her die in pain. That experience dug a deep wound that will never heal in your heart. You vowed you were never going to end up like your mother.

It was your in-laws voice and the lawyer's  that brought you back to the present.

You listened as he read the will that excluded you from owning anything that was his except of course his children  who would come to ownership of all he had when they turn eighteen respectively.

Your face turned pale and aghast with sudden sickness. You could not believe your ears at what was read out. The only question forming in your mind found a way out of your lips.

'How am I to take care of three children all by myself?'

Pa Ralph, your husband's  most senior brother turned to the lawyer to ask: 

'Does that question have an answer in the will?'

You watched the lawyer chuckle at the sarcasm in your in-laws statement and then shook his head 

'What', you screamed wiping the tears that had now gathered to humiliate you.

'Where do you want me and your late brother's children go to?'

'You should have thought about that when you made his life a living hell, said Pa Ralph that was mad with you from time immemorial.

'How are we even sure the children are our brother's?' Olajumoke, the immediate sister of your  late husband interjected, before submitting to tears. Her statement didn't go without disapproval from other members of the family. But that didn't assuage your anger.

You were stunned. Wishing you could jump at Olajumoke and tear her into pieces. But you can't, you are now at their mercies.

When there was silence, the lawyer then read how the children are to be taken care of.

Eniola your first daughter will go to live with Big mummy, the most senior sister of your husband's siblings who would be solely responsible for her upkeep.

Your two sons Dare and Dayo would go to live with Pa Ralph. You are free to visit at any time. But as to taking care of them yourself, the lawyer must see to it that you have the means. If that is not the case, everything remain as stated by your husband's last wish.

You didn't know whether to scream in protest or just wail uncontrollable. The latter seem to appeal to you. You buried your face in your palms and wept uncontrollably. Your children who are too young to understand what was happening to you or to them joined you in shedding tears while your in-laws although pale inwardly decided it was best they keep their sympathy to themselves. You were indeed doomed! You now understood that your husband's silence all those years were a quiet dangerous storm waiting to blow all over you. You knew that you stretched his patience way too far. You wondered whether you took your late mother's advise too far or you just got it all wrong. Compared to your father, you knew your husband was ten times better over and over again. Even though he kept his distance from you, he never kept his love away from his children. He seemed to have transferred the love he had for you to them.

You now know that your case is 'Had I known'. You are now full of regrets wishing you could turn back the hands of time to right the wrongs you have committed. You not only made war with your husband but also with his siblings who kept their distance  waiting for such a time as this. You chided yourself for failing to soften when you noticed that your husband starting emaciating and spending  much time alone in his study. You never knew he was carrying the burden of depression brought about by allegations of corruption  at his office which he knew nothing about and added to it was your unreasonable character that drained life out of him. You told yourself the bitter truth. You  murdered your own husband!

The prattling  young wife before you swallowed her pride in the pouch of wisdom you gave her from your own story. You have become a counselor to young wives, teaching them timeless ways of remaining in the hearts of their husbands.

She thanked you profusely with a tear or two escaping her eyes and deep remorse.

' I will never again in my life disrespect my husband', she vowed and you knew she meant it. You smiled then, wishing you had  a second chance like her. But you rested in the joy that you are merely helping young women prevent the mistake you made in your marriage years ago.

Thank you for stopping by. Apologies to you my readers because this story went beyond 1,000 words. In any case, I hope it is worth the while? Till we meet again. I am yours truly,

Julius Topohozin.